Sometimes people ask stupid questions on Quora that I decide to answer here:
Q: “Why do white people abandon their aged parents in nursing homes after the love and sacrifices they made for them as kids?”
Where did you get such an ill-informed and downright ignorant idea about white people?
That’s a rhetorical question. Oh, sorry. Too many syllables. Let’s put it this way, you don’t have to answer that question. I already have a good idea of where you get such crazy racial notions from. You’re also flat-out wrong about what white people do with their aging parents.
Sorry, Dad. I just remembered that I’m white and I don’t have any time for you.
My father, who was stricken with Parkinson’s disease, opted to take the hospice route onto the next plane of existence. He passed away in the living room of my childhood home – his and my mother’s home – surrounded by his wife, children, grandchildren, daughters-in-law, and other family and friends.
So, there’s one who didn’t die in a nursing home.
My grandmother (father’s side) passed away in her bedroom in my childhood home, the victim of a heart attack. She had been living with us pretty much since my parents moved into that house. So, no nursing home there. We took care of Gam Gam until the bitter and sudden end.
My other grandmother (mom’s side) passed away in a hospital. We took her there because she fell down a flight of stairs, broke her hip, and went into a coma. When it became painfully obvious that she wasn’t coming out of it, she left this world via the “hospice route,” surrounded by her daughter, son-in-law, and beloved grandchildren. Again, not a nursing home.
While I’ve done a good job of countering your accusations so far, the next paragraph will be your “Ha! Gotcha” moment. Are you ready for it?
My mother passed away in a nursing home. Yes, in typical “white people fashion” – whatever that is – my family elected to place my mother in a nursing home. After my father’s death, Mom slid further and further into her mental illness, dementia, and depression. She quickly turned her home into something straight out of the TV show “Hoarders,” complete with garbage, unfinished food, and rats in the living room.
If that weren’t bad enough, she frequently ran out into the street for no discernable reason. More than once, she was nearly hit by passing cars during these moments. Like the white people they are, my family placed Mom in a nursing home for her safety and our peace of mind. All of us lived elsewhere and she flat-out refused to live with any of us during his final days. More importantly, because of her dementia, she needed round-the-clock care, which none of us could provide due to jobs, children, etc.
That’s the last tea you’ll have at the house, Cracka Granny. Off to the nursing home you go!
So, that covers my family, but we might not be representative of ALL white people. If you can give me some time, I’ll check in with my fellow ‘cracka-ass crackas” out there. You’ll have to give them time to reply, though. As you know, they’re busy keeping that whole “systemic white supremacy” thing going, and that takes a lot of work.
In the meantime, you should get out and meet more white people. You might discover that most of us are decent human beings… once you get past the wet dog smell.
